“You want her to be as vulnerable and exposed as possible. You don’t want her closing her legs and protecting the meaty, pink parts. She’ll try clamming up,” Betty suggested I find ways to do my affirmations like that.I didn’t know what that word meant. I had heard of Stuart Smalley’s affirmations where he has says “I am good enough, I am smart enough and dammit people like me!” into a mirror on old Saturday Night Live episodes but it sounded like something Oprah would do and not part of. We talked, talked a lot. About her childhood and how she lived; about my childhood and growing up in what she would probably consider poverty. We talked about the war and why I joined up and what I did. I tried to be honest even though there was a lot of that I really wanted to forget. I let it all out there: the good, the bad and the really ugly. I think it was good for both of us. We talked for what seemed like just a short time but before I realized it dinner had come and gone and it was. To fiteverything in, Mother took everything except clothes I needed for schooland put them in the spare bedroom wardrobe, pointing out I would not needany of them until the play had finished. Mother then wanted to see if allthe new garments fitted properly, so she made me strip and put on one ofthe bras and panties. She showed me how to clip on a bra and I theninserted the silicone inserts, it all felt a bit weird, but they fitted mequite comfortably. I then tried on each of the four outfits;. I'm really looking forwardto that, Matt. Just you and me will be alone without having to worry aboutgetting interrupted."I smiled and kissed him. "I can't tell you how much I'm looking forward tothat." Matt, have you given any thought to what you're going to do this summer?" I'm trying first to get through this semester. What's on your mind?" Well... I've thought since we might get our own place for next semestermaybe.. staying here all summer and hoped you'd consider staying here withme.".
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